I used to have a friend who created a version of the NOFX song A Perfect Government that replaced the lyric “cat” in the refrain “how did the cat get so fat” with her older sister’s name. I now think of this often as I have gone from:
to…
In eight short years.
I should really exercise more and drink less good beer, but that is difficult to do. Poverty is good for your waistline; a life of leisure, affluence and frivolity is not.
I am just bitching in order to write something.
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Your problem, it appears to me, is that you gave up a Beastie Boys shirt for some god awful polo number. The shorts abide, but I just won’ stand (because I’m far fatter than you) for a mint green polo on you my dear boy.